The Cost of Confidence
Mary is a highly creative soul who loves encouraging individuals to authentically express themselves through fashion, music, and art. She’s an intuitive and nurturing Christian, Wife and Mother. She spends her time chasing after her 3-year-old daughter; styling fun new fashion ideas; writing and singing indie soul music; and consistently participating in self-development activities. Ideation and futurism are two of her top-five strengths, so she has no shortage of visionary ideas to share!
I still remember the crushing feeling I felt in my stomach when my future boss told me in our initial interview that my business and dreams were stupid. I was interviewing for a position that, at the time, was at the height of my banking career. I wasn’t feeling confident. My anxiety had been on level ten days before the interview even started.
I wanted to make an outstanding impression. I had rehearsed my answers to typical interview questions for days. I religiously practiced the presentation of the case study they had asked me to complete. I meticulously planned my outfit to ensure that I “looked the part”. Yet with all this preparation, I was left stunned at his discouraging comments regarding my dreams.
“Fashion is nice and all, but you should ditch those silly aspirations and focus all your efforts on being an excellent banker for us.” That was his sales pitch.
Unfortunately, I bought into it. That very same day the company made me an offer I felt I couldn’t refuse. I completely dropped my business and my dreams just like he told me to, and I found myself stuck. I woke up each day feeling anxious, uncertain, and meek.
Though I had been searching for a job that provided financial stability it felt like it cost me a lot—my dignity, my confidence, my sense of creative freedom. At that time, I was also pregnant with my first child. My spirit was swimming in unpredictability and longing for a roadmap on how to navigate the tumultuous waters of change.
Daily I operated in a state of robotic numbness. I dreaded my responsibilities and the way I was showing up in the world. After returning to work from Maternity Leave, attitudes towards me had drastically changed. My team members no longer saw me as an asset but rather a liability to the company. At one point my manager expressed, “her role is not for someone with children.” I was offered a severance package and laid-off. The surprise move was a gut-punch to my self-esteem.
I went through a trial of self-doubt and diminished self-confidence. My deep-seeded depression began seeping into my personal relationships and my ability to make decisions. One day after crying from the aftermath of yet another disappointing job interview a quiet voice whispered to my spirit, “what about your dream?”
I had been unemployed for a year at this point and was running thin on my unemployment benefits.
Once again, uncertainty and apathy had clouded my mind, so I was unable to see the possibilities.
“What about my dream?” I finally asked myself.
It was at that moment I had an epiphany. It was the enemy that spoke to me before. He told me to forget about my business and my dreams. It was a distraction to keep me from reaching my full potential. I began a new chapter of self-reflection and self-discovery. I decided to throw everything I had been told and everything I thought I knew out the window. I decided to begin again.
In May of 2019 I re-launched my company and my dreams. It took loads of positive self-talk and putting blinders on to ignore the distractions. Even though I was starting over and building the foundation from the ground up, I felt an enormous sense of relief. With each new project and customer, I gained back pieces of my self-confidence.
I was able to show up authentically again. I was able to get excited about initiatives. I was able to find my voice and be decisive in my actions. I was able to speak confidently about who I am and my self- worth. I was able to take the experiences from my personal journey and develop an incredibly unique approach to fashion and image consulting.
With an intimate understanding of how impactful your wardrobe and self-image are, my primary goal is to impart my knowledge and expertise so that you walk away feeling confident in your look.
Inspiring confidence is the key.
When you feel confident, you’re more likely to show up authentically. You’re more likely to feel empowered to make decisions without depending on external validation.
When you feel confident, you’re more equipped to handle the unexpected conversations and situations that pop-up in life.
When you feel confident, you’re able to take the labels that others have created for you and re-define them to match your true narrative.
When you look good and feel confident, no matter what obstacles are presented to you, you can overcome them with style and grace!
Want to stay in touch with Mary?
Email: mary@egoshy.com
Facebook: @EgoSHYLLc
Instagram: @egoshyfashion
Websites: www.egoshy.com